"Taking Care of Business"

We were poor college students who possessed the finer skills of frugality. Tony Blumenberg, my roommate, and I had learned well important tricks to staying alive. Back in those dark ages we didn't have a refrigerator and, because of our work schedules, we did’nt purchase the evening meal ticket at the college cafeteria. To save money we generally ate in our room, but we had to be careful of the types of food we purchased. Canned stuff was good if you ate it in a short period of time. Anything that needed cool or cold was out of the question. Snacks were appropriate if placed in airtight containers to keep the varmints out, of which there were many in Houston, Texas. Hiding places were a necessity because some of the varmints were other guys who shared our common living area. Oh, the good old days – prepared me for parenthood!

So it was in the spring of 1978 that we bought some groceries, including a gallon jar of apple juice that we projected we could finish off before it turned bad. We polished 2/3 of it off quickly but then set it aside and was forgotten. We rediscovered it a few days later. Being poor, frugal students there is no way we were going to throw it away without checking on it. We put it through the poor, frugal college student tests: look, smell, test, evaluate. Look: is anything growing in it or on it? Smell: can you get it past your nose to your mouth? Test: can all or any of this be salvaged? Evaluate: will this kill us if we eat it?

I opened the lid, which was bulging just a bit, to hear a slight "pfssss." "Don't remember hearing that before," we wondered. We tentatively smelled the mouth of the jar. "Don't remember it having that vinegar kind of smell," we thought. I looked inside. "Wonder how fuzz got inside of the jar with the lid on," said I as I shoved it toward Tony. "That's not fuzz," said my incredibly perceptive roommate. "Then how did a bug get in there?" "That's not a bug, either," said Tony as he turned up his nose. "That’s mold. Didn't you learn anything in biology?" He didn't have to be mean. It did look like something from science class. With disappointment, we realized this apple juice was not going to pass the tests.

Then we hit on an idea. If it looked liked something from science class, let's treat as such. And that was how the jar was transformed from a drink to THE EXPERIMENT!! Instead of throwing it away, we set it on a shelf and watched it grow. Most of the time we ignored it, but every once in a while someone would come to our room, look up on the shelf and exclaim, "WHAT IS THAT?" "It’s the experiment," we would reply calmly and introduce the two. As the weeks rolled on it grew tentacles and expanded in size. It was pretty interesting. Completely useless. But interesting.

A month before the end of the school year, I moved out of the dorm and into an apartment. I wanted to get things ready to bring Sheila home as my wife a month after final exams. Tony, Steve, Marvin and Sheila helped me move. All my earthly possessions fit in the back of a pickup. And I brought with me the experiment. Sheila had never seen it. She didn’t want to see it now. Especially in the apartment she was scheming to claim as her own in a couple months. I insisted that I keep it because it was my apartment. She relented (mostly because she knew it was only a matter of time). THE EXPERIMENT continued to grow, the cap bulged and I did not dare even bump the lid.
A few weeks after carrying my bride across the threshold, I came home from work and opened the cabinet that held THE EXPERIMENT. I wasn't looking for it, I just happened to notice it was no longer on the laboratory shelf. I knew what had happened before I even asked. "I threw it away," Sheila stated matter of factly. "It was useless, ugly, disgusting and taking up space." And that was that. THE EXPERIMENT was over. I sure hope the garbage man did not accidentally smash that jar. Who knows what plagues would have been released. On the other hand, it may have held the cure to something. Not marital disagreements, but maybe something useful.

It wasn't really much of an experiment because Tony and I didn't put any effort into it. It was, however, a prime example of the results of neglect. Things happen when we practice neglect. Very few of them are good. It didn’t take any effort at all to ruin the apple juice, just apathetic neglect. Lose it under a jacket carelessly tossed on the floor, and voila’ – garbage! If we want good things in our lives, we have to take care of business. If we want healthy bodies, we have to make the effort to eat right, sleep right and exercise right. If we want our possessions to last and function properly, we have to make the effort to maintain them. If we want to stay employed, we must fulfill our responsibilities. If we want good relationships, we must make the effort to nurture those relationships. Only bad things happen when we neglect what is important.

When I was young, food appeared on the table at meal times, clean clothes appeared in my dresser drawers, my room was cleaned, my yard was mowed, my needs were met. As I grew up I realized that my parents were doing all those things. Good things were happening in my life because my folks were taking care of business. Those things became my responsibility as I grew into manhood. If I neglect them, bad things happen. If I take care of business, good things happen.

Of all the business we must take care of, relationships are the most important and require the most care. Only bad things happen when we neglect people. Anger, hurt, distance, jealousy, acting out, searching other places for love and care, regrets, and eventually lost relationships. But if we take care of business with people that we care about good things happen. Love, friendship, care, fulfillment, shared memories, mutual encouragement and satisfaction at the end of our lives.

Worse things happen when we neglect our relationship with God. Inner turmoil, no joy, lack of meaning and fulfillment, hurtfulness toward others, searching in places that only result in guilt, and eternity separated from God and everything good. But if we take care of business in our relationship with God we discover the meaning of life, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control, and a Heavenly Dad that pulls us up on His lap. Best of all, an eternity in His Presence.

What once was a life supporting, nutritious drink became a useless nuisance. Even worse, had I drank the liquid formerly known as apple juice, it would have made me terribly sick. Might have even killed me. Not because of what we did, but because of what we didn’t do, all because of neglect.

Anything important being neglected in your life? Look around. A little bit of action goes a long way in taking care of business.

"Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God." Hebrews 13:16 (NRSV)

"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification." Romans 14:19 (NIV)

"Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord." Hebrews 12:14 (NIV)

"And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." Hebrews 11:6 (NIV)

"Do you trust me?"

Way, way back when our oldest daughter, Carissa, was a mere toddler, I used to play a game with her. On cold days following worship, I would sit her on the top of the hat rack in the lobby of the church I pastored in Beaver, PA to bundle her up. It was easier. Because she was up high, she wouldn't squirm as much while I wrestled her into hat, coat and mittens. (Now, to those of you who are thinking I was cruel father, putting my daughter in danger, let me assure you that she was safe. Sheila would have killed ME!) After she looked like Charlie Brown ready to play in the snow, I would step back. She would hold out her arms and stare at me. "Do you trust me?" I would ask. "Yes" she would reply in her little toddler voice. "Then jump! I promise I will catch you." Since I was a step away, she could not bring herself to do it. She said she trusted me… but there was a limit to that trust.

"C'mon," I would coax her. "I'm your dad. I would never let you fall. I'm strong and you can trust me. Now, jump!" From that distance, she would not do it. So I moved a little bit closer. As I did, she would lean toward me, expecting me to reach up and grab her. Realizing I was not coming quite close enough, she would pull back. Again, "Do you trust me? Then jump! I PROMISE I will catch you. You have nothing to be afraid of." She would try to reach me, to touch me, but could not quite make the stretch. And she'd pull back. She would not leave the safety of the hat rack.

Finally, I would move close enough that she could lean to within a few inches. "Do you trust me?" I would ask again. "Then jump into my arms!" And she would. She could trust her dad with those few inches. I would pull her tight, hug her and tell her, "You can trust me. I would never, ever, ever, ever let you fall." As time went on, she would jump from greater and greater distances. Sometimes trust takes time and experience to kick in.

DO YOU TRUST ME?

One of my favorite scenes in moviedom is when Indiana Jones comes to a seemingly impassable chasm while attempting to retrieve the Holy Grail to save his father. He looks down in terror, knowing he has only a few minutes to reach the other side before his father dies. The only clue he has to work with is, "The man of God will walk by faith." He recognizes the implication: he must step out into thin air and trust something good will happen. Indiana closes his eyes, lifts one foot and steps into the cavern. Instead of tumbling to the bottom, his foot lands on solid ground. The bridge is disguised to look like the ravine. He throws dirt on to the bridge so he can see it and quickly crosses over. A moment of faith changed everything.

DO YOU TRUST ME?

That was the question facing Jesus as He prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane. He knew that only a few hours separated Him from a Roman cross. He had seen people crucified. He knew the agony of the physical pain because He had watched men hang exposed for days. He also knew the agony of shouldering the pain of all of mankind's sin awaiting Him -- being cut off from the Father. Crying out to His Dad, He begged for another plan. "Do you trust me?" were the words God seemed to be saying. "Do you trust me in My plan? Do you trust me in your pain? Do you trust me that it will be better on the other side? Do you trust me to raise you to life?" He did, and it changed EVERYTHING. For Him. For you. For me. For the world now and forever.

DO YOU TRUST ME?

It's pretty easy to trust God when He is within inches of us as we sit on the hat racks of life. When leaping into His arms is a fairly guaranteed deal. When there's not much chance He can or will pull away. It's a much different proposition when He's across the room, we're stuck on the hat rack, no one else is around and there is not ladder in the building. And He says, "Jump!" from 20 feet away. In those times it seems that God is just not making sense. And there's no possible way He can catch us. And He's not answering our pleas for explanations. And we're in pain. And the janitors are turning out the lights. And no one else has to sit on the hat rack or jump. And we've got lots of reasons, facts and proven studies of why it is not healthy to jump. And God doesn't seem to want to hear any of it, He just wants us to jump.

DO YOU TRUST ME?

It isn't trust if Carissa can grab me before she leaves the hat rack. It isn't trust if Indiana can see the bridge before he steps. It isn't trust for Jesus if there is no cross, no pain, no death, no separation from the Father and no resurrection. And it isn't trust for us if we don't obey even when it doesn't make sense. But in every case, it is better after the making the leap of trust than it was before. Carissa's safety and security in my arms, Indiana's healing of his father, Jesus' glory. And for you – intimacy with God and experiencing Him work in our lives in ways we cannot see.

DO YOU TRUST ME?

Whatever you're facing, trust God. Listen carefully for His voice, (don't you dare jump until you hear His instructions. There's a difference between obedient trust and stupidity.) But once you hear His voice, jump! God WANTS to, LONGS to catch you. Refuse to give into the human desire to be in control, to trust yourself. Just jump. Close your eyes if you have to, but leap! It is always better on the other side. It may take a while to get there, but you'll be glad you did as you feel the strong, loving arms of your Heavenly Dad envelop you. Hold you. Protect you. Reassure you. Love you.

Otherwise you may be sitting on the hat rack for the rest of your life.

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)

"And we know that all that happens to us is working for our good if we love God and are fitting into his plans." Romans 8:28 (TLB)

"for I can do everything God asks me to with the help of Christ who gives me the strength and power." Philippians 4:13 (TLB)

"OK, This is Going to be Good!!"

Have you ever run up against a mountainous difficulty and asked the question, "Why does life have to be so hard?" Just what I thought, it's unanimous. Life is full of hard times and ongoing struggles. That doesn’t make life bad, it makes life, well… life. I have an idea for responding to difficulties that I think can help us all. I ran across it while looking at the following story.

The guys had been with their teacher long enough to know he was something special. He didn’t act or react like others. He was, to put it in 70's terms, out of this world. So when the class was trying to get away for some R & R and were chased by folks clamoring for more from the teacher, it didn’t surprise the guys that their teacher postponed their break. He had compassion on the crowds and spoke to them. In fact He taught and he taught. All morning, through the afternoon and was heading into evening. Finally, one of the guys went to the teacher with a helpful hint, "You’d better send these folks away to get some food before it gets dark because there is NO PLACE around here to get food, the people have not eaten all day, and the sun is wearing them out." Satisfied that they had given the Teacher the proper advice, the guys waited for him to shoo the crowds home. Surprise.

The teacher’s words to the guys turned them pale. "You give them something to eat." Their thoughts are not recorded in the chronicles of history, but it doesn’t take much imagination to realize their thoughts went something like, "Whoa! There are some 5,000 men here and thousands more women and children. Is he crazy? Has he been in the sun too long? Maybe we’d better find some shade and let him come back to earth. He has no idea what he is saying." After the guys pulled themselves back together, out of their mouths came these words, "Eight months’ salary wouldn’t buy enough food for everyone to have a bite. Are we supposed to spend that kind of money to buy food." Wrong answer. Very wrong.

The guys had been with the teacher long enough to know better. They'd watched him heal every kind of physical ailment, teach with extraordinary power, answer questions that had stumped scholars for centuries, and even raised a girl from the dead. So what was it about his instructions to feed the crowd that sent them reeling? Had they not been paying attention? Did they think manufacturing food was harder than raising the dead? Did they just have short memories? No, I think they simply panicked and reverted to seeing the situation through their human lens instead of viewing it through the supernatural lens of their teacher.

Now, here’s where the new way of responding comes in. Instead of panic and citing all the reasons the situation was impossible, the guys should have said…

"OK, THIS IS GOING TO BE GOOD!!"

The teacher did not actually expect the guys to come up with food for over 10,000 mouths. He was testing them. What he really wanted them to do was realize they were facing the impossible, turn back to him and ask, "How?" Then he could show them the way to overcome the difficulty. He was offering the chance to participate in a miracle instead of standing on the sidelines as spectators. But, NOOO. Not only did they land as spectators, but red faced ones at that. The teacher took the few biscuits and small fish they did have, prayed over them, handed them to the guys to pass out to the crowds, everyone ate until they were stuffed, AND, they collected 12 baskets full of leftovers. There never was a need to panic. The teacher had something wonderful in mind.

"OK, THIS IS GOING TO BE GOOD!!"

When we face difficult situations, it is not because God turned His head and they slipped through. It is because He has something wonderful in mind. Every impossible situation is an opportunity to watch God work. That's why our response to tough times ought to be, "OK, THIS IS GOING TO BE GOOD!!" If God has allowed it, He is going to use it. There never is a need to panic, God has something wonderful in mind.

And here's the best part -- the more difficult the difficulty, the louder we ought to say it because the wonder will be even greater. If you're facing a hill you might whisper "OK, THIS IS GOING TO BE GOOD!!" because the miracle will be nice. But if you're looking at Mount Everest, you'll want to scream "OK, THIS IS GOING TO BE GOOD!!" because whatever God is up to is going to be huge.

If Jesus had produced a loaf of bread, it would have been a miracle and it would have been nice. But when He fed thousands with a handful of muffins and sardines, it was overwhelming. God offers us the opportunity to participate in the miracle if we turn to Him and ask, "How?" He does not expect us to handle it ourselves, but to listen to instructions and follow His lead. When we do so, we not only experience what God has in mind but it makes us stronger, wiser, more full of faith in preparation for the next difficulty.

The other option is to panic and see the situation through our purely human lens. That's how we end up spectators and wonder why God things happen to other people and not us. It's also why our bodies and relationships get damaged by the stress. Overall it really isn't much fun. Think of those pathetic disciples each carrying a basketful of leftovers as Jesus dismissed the crowds, every step reminding them of what could have been.

So remember – the next time you hit a rough patch of road, the right response is, (let's all say it together) …

"OK, THIS IS GOING TO BE GOOD!!"

And then watch and listen for the wonder of God being worked out.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28 (NIV)

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4 Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." James 1:2-5 (NIV)

"Distance"

OK, everybody. Here’s a short quiz, fill in the blank style. "_________ makes the heart grow fonder." Anybody got it? Yes, you there in the nasty looking shirt. You know, they're having a sale downtown this weekend … Your answer is? Very good. "ABSENCE." "Absence makes the heart grow fonder." A very old cliché we’ve known since we were wee lads and lasses. Actually, there are two versions of that quote. The second has the same meaning using a different word, "DISTANCE makes the heart grow fonder."

I suppose there is some truth to the saying, but for the most part it is baloney. When we are first separated from a loved one the pain of being apart makes it feel like our love for them is stronger. But as time goes on, the absence of interaction causes our love to lessen. If the time is protracted enough, we actually grow apart because relationship requires interaction and shared experiences. When we return to each other time is required to reestablish the relationship. In many cases, the REAL truth is the "Distance make the heart go wander!!"

Well, you did so well on that last quiz, let’s try another. Same format. "Parting is such ________ __________." Who has the fastest finger? You, ma'am, over there with the cranberry juice. YES! "Parting is such SWEET SORROW." Does anybody really believe that? I HATE parting from people I genuinely care about. It hurts way too much. Maybe the author of that particular quote was talking about people he didn’t like… In that case, maybe it is true, but I don’t think that was the point. Parting means leaving, which means separation, which means distance. I’m not sure there is any sweetness at all in that.

There is an even more harmful kind of distance than physical separation. That is emotional distance.

I was talking to my good friend, Jim Harvey, some time ago. (Everybody say, "HI, Jim"). I was having trouble with an important relationship at the time of his call. He listened and then made a profound statement that has been powerful in all my relationships since. Are you ready for it? "Distance is never good in relationships." Allow that to sink in. Apply it to the many relationships in your life. Emotional distancing from another person we care about is never good. Physical separation, as in "Fighters, please go to your corners," so we can cool off can be good for a very short time. But emotional distance that comes from anger or hurt is never good. It only causes the problems to get bigger, not smaller.

I remember sitting in Mr. Augbaugh’s ninth grade sociology class at Northwestern High School when we learned the two responses to danger or conflict. Anyone remember? "Flight or Fight" said Mr. A. We can stay and fight or we can run away. In relationships, lots of people physically run away thinking that will solve the problem. It doesn’t. That only removes the problem from immediate view. It is still there. Even if we never see that particular person again, the same problem will emerge in another relationship. We can emotionally remove ourselves in relationships as well. Sometimes it is the "silent treatment." Other times it is pretending there is no problem, effectively wearing a mask and living superficially. Flight doesn’t work. Trust me.

Fighting can be a problem as well. Physical violence is a devastating problem in our culture. But so is emotional violence. The latter can leave deep, unhealed scars in our lives after other wounds are healed. Fighting can involve blaming, sarcasm, insults, force, punishing, withdrawal of affection or approval, and other kinds of hurt. That kind of fighting doesn’t work. Trust me.

So what is the proper response when distance threatens a relationship? A different kind of fighting. Not fighting WITH the other person, but fighting FOR the relationship. Choosing to care, love, help, fulfill responsibility, and do what is best for the other person no matter how they act. Instead of following our feelings, it is an act of the will in spite of our feelings. Even when that other person does not respond the way we would like and wants to keep the distance. That kind of fighting does work. It is painful, but worth it. It is hard, but pays off. Trust me.

I’ve discovered three things that pave the way to do so. The first is commitment to the relationship -- the resolve to stick with it NO MATTER WHAT. The second is communication -- the resolve to keep talking until the distance is closed. The third is Christ – a personal, powerful relationship with the One who gives us the example, the instructions, the power and the fortitude to make the relationships work.

Everything in life that is worthwhile involves relationships. Distance will threaten every single one of them if they progress to any depth at all. Bridging the distance will strengthen the relationship in the long run and prepare it to blossom in even more difficult times.

OK, one more quiz. Ready? Fill in the blank. "Nobody ever said on their deathbed, I wish I’d spent more time at the __________." Got it. OK, Jim, I’ll let you answer this one. "THE OFFICE." That’s right. People who know they are going to die always talk about relationships. Sometimes in regret, sometimes in appreciation. Now is the time to close the gap, to bridge any chasms of distance. So go do it. Today.

Give your spouse a huge hug and say, " I'm committed to you, I love you and always will."
Go to that teenager that grinds your soul and reassure him/her of your constant and unconditional love.

Patch things up with that relative that lives in another state.

Reach out to the coworker that you have conveniently been avoiding.

Grab your toddlers, hold them tight and don't let them go until you say "I love you" ten times.

YOU take the initiative to reach out to the people in your life, remove the distance, let them know how important they are, and spend time with them.

""In your anger do not sin" : Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold." Ephesians 4:26-27 (NIV)

"The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."" Galatians 5:14 (NIV)

""If a brother sins against you, go to him privately and confront him with his fault. If he listens and confesses it, you have won back a brother." Matthew 18:15 (TLB)

"Truth"

TRUTH

The accused criminal stood before the man who would either set him free or sentence him to death. The judge was shaken by the calmness, the lack of fear in the one before him. "Everyone on the side of truth listens to me" stated the accused. The governor scoffed, turned cynical by too many years of sour life and asked the question most all of us wrestle with, "What is truth?" (John 18:37-38)

TRUTH

A recent Barna poll revealed that nearly 70% of Americans believe there is no absolute truth. In a society of relativism, rationalism, pragmatism and tolerance there is very little room for any belief in truth, real truth. But our ignorance does not make it untrue. Just makes us ignorant.

TRUTH

Is there truth, absolute truth. Or are we, like Pilate, simply left with a haunting question debated by philosophers and ignored by the rest of us. And, hey, is absolute truth important anyway? Is it something we should be concerned about?

TRUTH

Suppose you are having physical pain and go to a doctor. By putting you through a battery of tests she discovers that you are suffering from a terminal disease. The good news is that she had caught the disease in the very early stages and it can be treated. But, and this is a big but, she does not want to risk hurting your feelings or causing fear so she tells you that you are fine. Is absolute truth important? You BELIEVE you are fine – isn’t that enough? Nope. No matter what you believe, the truth is all that matters. And the absolute truth is that you need treatment or you are going to die.

TRUTH

Suppose you and I are walking along a busy downtown street. You intensely look at me as we talk. I look up just in time to see a truck jump the curb and head straight for us. You believe we are safe. I duck into an entryway of a nearby store and leave you to be crushed by the truck. Hey, I didn’t want to interrupt you. You can get really testy when you’re interrupted. Is absolute truth important in that situation? You BELIEVE you are safe, isn’t that enough? No matter what you believe, the truth is all that matters. And the absolute truth is that you are going to die if I don’t push you out of the way. Makes you feel like I’m a little more important than you thought, doesn’t it?

TRUTH

Let’s do another round of "Let’s Suppose." You believe that when you die you are done. There is nothing after this life and that’s it. Or you believe that if you are a good person you’ll go to heaven. As long as your list of good deeds is longer than the list of bad stuff you’ll walk through the pearly gates. Or you believe that it doesn’t matter what religion you follow as long as you truly believe and do your best. Does absolute truth matter? Hey, you believe you’ll be all right. Isn’t that enough? No matter what you believe, the truth is all that matters. And the absolute truth is that to get to heaven requires a personal relationship with God through Jesus Christ and without it Hell is on the other side of death.

TRUTH

I remember standing in front of the coffin of a very dear friend. With everything in me I wanted to go back a week to prevent the accident that took his life. No matter how badly I wanted to do so, the absolute truth was that he was dead and there was nothing I could do to change that truth.

The Bible provides us with absolute truth for living. No matter how much we would like to change some of it, we can’t. It is absolute and unchangeable. Instead of bucking against it we need to learn to embrace it. (Yes, even those pesky parts that we don’t like). By embracing the truth, it will set us free to be all that we were born to be.

Therefore the question we must answer in every situation is "What is the truth here?"

Truth is important, unchangeable and absolute. TRUTH REALLY IS ALL THAT MATTERS! By learning it through the Bible and living it through everyday life we discover God’s perspective on life. That is how we crawl up onto God’s lap and see life "From Where God Sits." I invite you to do so. It is worth it.

TRUTH

"Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." John 14:6 (NIV)

"To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. 32 Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."" John 8:31-32 (NIV)

"Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ." Ephesians 4:15 (NIV)

"BEHOLD: The Power of Cheese"

I was content to live and let live. Really, I was. I am not a violent person. Sheila, however …

I first heard the noise last summer while I was enjoying some afternoon Sabbath rest. It was a scurrying kind of sound. I looked out of our second story window toward the rain gutter thinking it was a bird walking in the gutter. Nothin’. Every Sunday afternoon the same thing happened. It sounded like it was just outside of our window. There was never anything there except the noise.

As we moved into the fall the noise seemed to disappear… most of the time. Every once in a while it would show up again. But, hey, live and let live. I can coexist with a little noise. I live in a small house with two teenagers and two elementary kids! Still didn’t know what it was but I had no clue how to figure it out.

In October Sheila was in the attic straightening our stuff and looked into a dollhouse stored "up there." She noticed that something had been sleeping in Papa Bear’s bed. Wait, no that’s a different story. She really did notice that something had eaten the ends off of a package of plastic hotdogs. (Don’t ask me why we have plastic hotdogs in our attic) There were also shreds of tissues scattered about. Ah, the plot thickened.

In November Sheila went into the attic to grab the Thanksgiving decorations. Sheila pulled out her cornhusk dolls designed to look like pilgrims. She’s had them for years, but there was something very different about them this year. I’m not an observant guy, but even I noticed the change. Something had eaten their faces. (Boy, did we have fun with that). They were in mint condition – except now they were faceless. Just two more faceless pilgrims in the crowds of life. After Thanksgiving Sheila was putting decorations away and found that ears of dried Indian corn she’d left in the attic had been completely stripped and the kernals taken. Whatever was "up there" had not only eaten the faces off of the pitiful pilgrims but had also robbed her decorative door hanging and left her the cobs behind.

I was amused but SHEILA WAS NOT HAPPY. Being a peace loving kind of person, she didn’t want to do anything vicious so she bought a pest preventing gadget. The idea is to plug it into an electrical outlet to emit a high pitched sound wave and thus chase away any varmints. We didn’t hear the noise anymore and thought our visitors from "up there" had vacated the premises.

In December Sheila once again ascended the stairs into the attic. After sending all the other Christmas stuff to the living room, Sheila carried down her box of angel ornaments. As she walked she heard rattling. Her angels have not, do not and never will rattle. Most are made of soft, lightweight materials that cannot rattle. The thought crossed her mind that a glass angel might have broken. She unpacked the angels to find, wonder of wonders, kernals of Indian corn nicely squirreled away and tissues neatly gathered for a nest. Whatever was "up there" had no plans of leaving anytime soon.

I was amused. Very amused. Amber was amused. Chadd was amused. But SHEILA WAS NOT HAPPY. Nor was she amused.

Those animals could have probably grown to a ripe old age, sitting in very small rocking chairs in the dollhouse, afghans lying across their laps, sipping cocoa and roasting plastic hotdogs in the fireplace except that they made a fatal mistake… They made Sheila mad. I have lived long enough to discover that it is not good when the mom of any family gets mad. And those mammals had made momma mad. She came home from the store with two very crude devices of destruction – mousetraps. She "asked" me to load them. I am not a violent person, but whatever was "up there" made momma mad. So using two small pinches of colby longhorn cheese I set the traps and placed one on each side of the attic entrance.

The next afternoon I was sitting at the desk in my office when I got a call. I had been there all day, many things on my mind. "We have success!" I heard my otherwise gentle wife scream on the other end of the line. Like a good husband my mind raced trying desperately to figure out what that meant, thinking I was obviously supposed to know and that I was probably in trouble if I couldn't figure it out quickly. Nothing came to mind.

"What in the world are you talking about?" I innocently asked.

"We have success ‘up there’. Both traps." she nearly shouted with delight.

"Oh. Well, did you take them out of the traps?"

"No way. That’s your job!" my gentle wife replied.

When I got home that evening I went "up there." She was right. Two small gray mice had met their maker in our devices of death. They should have known not to make momma mad. That was the end of our noise.

It wasn’t really the trap that got them. It was the cheese. One of the mice smelled the colby, scurried over and took a nibble. It had to be appealing after working so hard on all that dried corn. With the tasty treat, though, came the trap and the end of life. And I can just imagine the second mouse watch the first get caught, shed a mousy tear for his brother and then look at the other trap. "I never did think he was all that smart," he whispered to himself as he approached the other pinch of cheese. "He couldn't get it, but I'll be able to grab the cheese before the same thing happens to me. It won't happen to me. I’ll be able to get the cheese without the pain." He tried and quickly followed mouse number 1 to his eternal destiny. The power of cheese. Pretty stupid mice, don’t you think? Risking it all for a pinch of longhorn.

We'd never do that, would we? Sure we do. The desire for something moves us to ignore danger. We know what we want is wrong but we justify our actions and think we can get it without pain. But we can't and we pay the price. There is something in each of our lives that tempts us to risk all to get it. We even lie to ourselves as we watch others bring sorrow into their lives telling ourselves that other "mice" might not be able to get the cheese without pain, but we can. We scoff at high profile people like Robert Downey, Jr. or Darryl Strawberry. But everybody has cheese in his life. Everybody.

What is the cheese in your life? That which tempts you with great power, promising satisfying reward but delivering destruction and sorrow? I know what it is for myself. Now that I am older and wiser, I recognize that I must guard myself and run away from it. Otherwise I will not survive. The power of cheese is real and it is strong. We dare not mess with it, but claim the promises and power of God to say no. I hope you will.

"But remember this--the wrong desires that come into your life aren't anything new and different. Many others have faced exactly the same problems before you. And no temptation is irresistible. You can trust God to keep the temptation from becoming so strong that you can't stand up against it, for he has promised this and will do what he says. He will show you how to escape temptation's power so that you can bear up patiently against it." 1 Corinthians 10:13 (TLB)

Be blessed and BE BOLD!

"Take Care" or "Be Bold"

Some of you have wondered about the salutation at the end of my greetings and letters. The words, "Be Bold" may seem strange. Let me tell you why that has become my signature greeting over the past few years.

I became bothered by the way I ended conversations some years ago. I noticed that when I finished talking with someone, whether in person or on the phone, I nearly always ended with the words, "Take care." I thought that was a good way to communicate concern for someone. I don't believe that anymore.

In May 1993, I was in Colorado to help teach the Dynamic Communicators Workshop. After we finished up the week, I had the opportunity to talk with Rich, one of the other instructors. I'd wanted to have that time because I could see in Rich's actions and hear in his words a depth of the presence of God that I had not seen before. At the time, Rich had been battling Hodgkin's disease for several years and it appeared that God was touching the depths of his soul. I wanted to hear about it.

We rode the several hours together from Estes Park to Denver. I listened with excitement at how God had invaded Rich's life in wonderful ways. We laughed, we cried, we rejoiced, we hoped, and we shared deeply together about the ways that God shows up in our lives. We agreed to pray for each other, confident that God had the future in his hands. We spent that evening and night at Ken Davis' home, the president of the workshop.

It was the next morning that it happened. Rich and I were gathering our bags to go to the airport and were saying good-bye to Ken. The three of us hugged, laughed and were walking to the car. I said, "Well Ken, take care." Rich was walking behind me and said, "Well Ken, be bold!" Ken laughed and responded, "Do you two realize you just told me to do opposite things?" Rich did. He knew exactly what he was saying. Through some very difficult years God has taught Rich that life requires a lot more "being bold" and a lot less "taking care."

I've thought a great deal about that little conversation. Every time I say "take care" to someone I think about it. And ever since that morning in Denver I have gotten increasingly frustrated with myself whenever those two words exit my mouth. It seems to me that God has not called us to draw back, to pull up our defenses, to guard ourselves, to be careful. But rather, He instructs us to "be bold," to live with aggressiveness, to take life by the tail and live it with the confidence Jesus possessed. Many of our problems are a result of protecting ourselves instead of living with a Godly abandon. By taking our eyes off of ourselves and our stuff (taking care) and marching with our eyes on Jesus (being bold) we can experience the presence of God in ever increasing measure.

Joshua heard it from the lips of God this way, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord you God will be with you wherever you go." (Joshua 1:9)

That incident occurred 6 ½ years ago. Since then Rich has gone to Heaven. He lived the rest of his life boldly. I decided a long time ago to take Rich's advice to "Be bold!" And I'm done encouraging people to "Take care." It has taken a few years. Sometimes I've fallen back into that same old pattern of telling people to "Take care." I've often had to stop myself and change it to "Be Bold." But I think I've finally got it right.

As 2001 is upon us it is appropriate for me to encourage you to "BE BOLD!" God invites you to be a person of faith, to risk, to step out, to stretch, to trust God even when you can’t see what will happen when you do. People of God always live on the edge.

Will you? BE BOLD!

"So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"" Hebews 13:6 (NIV)

Tracks, Trees, and Typewriters

Christmas 1965. Under the tree was an electric race track, complete with a blue and a red car. It was a small scale model. And exactly what I wanted. I spent hours racing on that track, adjusting the speed of the car with a trigger control wired to the track. Every time I catch a whiff of an electric motor overheating, the memories of that race track flood back. What a great gift for a young fellow.

Christmas 1978. I should say pre-Christmas. We were newlyweds living in an apartment the size of a two-car garage. I know it was the size of a two car garage because it was the second story of a two car garage. A few weeks before Christmas we drove to Kroger's grocery store on Shepherd Street where they were selling Christmas trees. We picked out a good looking pine, stuffed it into the back of my pickup and drove back to the apartment.

We tugged and shoved the tree up the stairs only to discover that an evergreen doesn't bend, no matter how hard you try to force it around the corner from the stairway into the kitchen. My brother-in-law, Steve, and I decided to take a break and think.

We pulled the tree up straight only to discover that we were trying to get a 9 ½ foot tree into an apartment with an eight foot ceiling. It didn't seem nearly that big in Kroger's parking lot. We cut some off of the bottom and some off the top until it fit. Just barely. That is it fit vertically.

It was then we discovered that a 9 ½ foot tree is really, really, REALLY wide. No matter how much we pushed the tree into the corner it still spread its wings over half that small living room. Fortunately, we only had a borrowed couch and a furnished easy chair to work around.

It was then we discovered that we didn't have any ornaments. Sheila and I purchased some inexpensive glass bulbs, several strings of lights, an angel topper, and some silver garland. It was a blast putting that together. We also found some cheap "paint yourself" wooden ornaments, 99 for $9.99. We still have them. Every day during that December I'd wake up to the wonderful smell of pine. A great first Christmas for a couple of newly married kids.

Christmas 1983. Living in the hills of central Pennsylvania where it never stops snowing. Our first born, Andrew, was 14 months old. Tow headed, bright blue eyes, barely walking and full of life. Sheila and I were excited about sharing Christmas with a child. The three of us sat on the floor and pulled out Andrew's first present. He opened it with a squeal. Out emerged a tiny, plastic, Fisher-Price, 3 keyed typewriter with plastic keys that moved up and down and rang a bell when you hit each key. He loved it. So much so that he didn't want to open up all the other gifts we got for him. Like good parents, we forced him to leave the present that he liked to open up all the other gifts we purchased. But as soon as he got the gift open he went back to the typewriter. Of all the stuff he got, that little typewriter was the simplest, the least expensive, and the one he liked the best. He spent hours playing with it. As he prepares to major in computers, I think it all started with that typewriter.

Looking back, Christmas 1965 was not really about a race track. I treasure the memory of it because it caused my dad be with me. Side by side we'd race the blue and red cars. He showed me how to sand off the contacts on the cars to make a better connection, how to change the bodies on the cars, how to slow in the curves and speed through the straight a ways. And it caused him to smile because he's given me something I enjoyed.

Looking back, Christmas 1978 was not really about a tree either. It was about sharing life together and creating couple memories. We discovered things about life and each other through that season that we didn't even know were there. Life was simple and fresh. And it caused us to smile at ourselves.

Looking back, Christmas 1983 was not about a toy typewriter. It was about a toddler who has grown into a wonderful young man. It was about a boy I love more deeply than I ever thought possible. It was about the pure, untarnished joy that only a kid in a diaper can express through his laughter. And it caused us to smile.

Christmas memories that mean the most are not about the "stuff" - the presents, the food, the activities, the reunions. They are about the people. The "stuff" is the means by which we connect with the people. The stuff is not bad, it's just not the point. Life is all upside down and frustrating when the "stuff" gets in front of the people on our value list.

As Christmas approaches this weekend, I encourage you to deliberately use the "stuff" to create shared memories that will last. Cherish the people who mean the most to you.

And most of all, deliberately cherish the God who loves you more than you can imagine. Only because of Him do we have the people and the stuff in our lives. Jesus really is "The Reason for the Season." Worship Him, honor Him, give yourself fully to Him. If you do you will cause Him to smile at YOU.

When the final page in your life is turned, those two relationships are all that will really matter.

"Jesus replied: "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."" Matthew 22:37-40 (NIV)

"Angles of Life"

I'd always thought it was because my kids liked me and they liked me holding them. They would reach out their little arms toward me and want to be in my big, strong arms. When they got hurt, when they were tired, when they were scared, or when they wanted to see something they couldn't reach. Turns out to be purely selfish. It wasn’t about me, it was about THEM!

I tripped over this insight a few years ago when my youngest son, Chadd, was standing in the kitchen pointing at something on the kitchen counter to the left of the sink. Being a toddler he couldn’t communicate clearly so we played "the guessing game." You know the one… he points, grunts and I make guesses as to what he is looking at and what he wants me to do with it. (And we parents think we are in charge.) A similar game is played when the toddlers become teenagers. It's called, "How could you be so stupid?" This game is played when the parent asks a question, the teenager looks at the parent, and, often without even verbalizing it, communicates to the parent the question, "How could you be so stupid?"

Back to Chadd… I picked up item after item asking, "Is this what you want?" To which he would pull the pacifier from his mouth and say, "No." He kept pointing, I kept guessing, he kept saying "No" and I got frustrated.

In desperation I knelt down beside him, sighted up his arm and looked. It was instantly clear. I stayed on my knees a while and looked around at his world. It was enlightening. Do you realize that toddlers live in a world of kneecaps? I'll bet their experts. Big kneecaps, small kneecaps, kneecaps in hose, naked kneecaps, invisible kneecaps covered by jeans. Our world is built for human type individuals that are at least five feet tall. Everything looks different from the angle of someone two feet tall. EVERYTHING. The floor is close but all the good stuff is far away. Feet are constantly swinging toward you. Shopping carts look like bulldozers. You can't reach anything beyond the second shelf. And if you take a risk and climb on the kitchen table the big people yell at you. It is daunting, dangerous and disconcerting. That is why my kids wanted me to hold them – so they could see life better and be protected from the kneecaps. They felt safe when they were in my arms. And when a parade comes by the best seat on the street is on dad's shoulders, using his ears as handles.

The way life looks is determined by your angle.

Life appears a lot like Chadd's world to us human types much of the time. We just don't realize it. We see things we need or want up on the counter of life, but we can't reach them. Problems threaten to kick us in the teeth. When we take a risk often people yell at us. We get scared, hurt, frustrated, tired, and life looks overwhelming. That's reality. The good news is that we have the same option Chadd chose – we can reach our arms up toward our dad and He'll hold us, help us get what we need, protect us, and reassure us.

But best of all, when we're in God's arms we can view life from where He sits. Only then can we see it as it really is. The world was build by our heavenly Dad and only from where He sits does it make sense. Your life was specifically designed for you, but only as you see it from where God sits does it make sense. Sitting on His shoulders is the best seat on the street.

The way life looks depends a lot on where you’re sitting.

I hope today you will ask God to pick you up to give you at least a glimpse of what your life looks like from where He sits.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. 9 " As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9 (NIV)

"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." Jeremiah 33:3 (NIV)

The Surprising Truth About Christmas

My wife, Sheila, did the unthinkable last week – she went shopping the day after Thanksgiving. It’s not that she really wanted to. Being a good mother, she went to get those perfect Christmas gifts for the kids at extraordinary prices. So at 6:30 am (as in the morning) she braved the crowds (yes, crowds at 6:30) to shop. It was awful. Lines and rude people were every where buying gifts for people they don’t even like. She did battle at one location of a national electronics store chain for an hour and then waited in line for half an hour. Only to be told when she was one customer from the checkout, "Put your stuff down and leave the store. We must evacuate because of a gas leak." Moans and groan everywhere. I think some of those people would have rather risked death than put down their prized purchases. All those wasted hours of elementary school fire drills.

Sheila finally did make it home safely. "I don’t think this is what Christmas is all about," she commented to me in frustration. " And I will never do that again!"

No, that is not what Christmas is all about. Nor is it what we most often picture in our minds. We know it is not elbowing other people for the last Pokemon pillow, but have we fooled ourselves with other wrong, but seemingly benign, thoughts of Christmas? How would we describe the perfect Christmas? See if you recognize this… as you pull into the driveway of the perfect Christmas, icicle lights hang from the roof, Santa is perched in the front yard to the right and snow is lightly falling. The air is crisp, but not cold. You are greeted by smiles all around. Even the family cat is grinning. The fireplace throws warmth and light into the living room decorated in reds, greens and whites. A perfect tree stands in the corner surrounded by the perfect number of presents. You enjoy a perfect meal with all the people you love and then exchange presents as Christmas carols fill the room. Everybody gets along. All the children and elderly cooperate. Martha Stewart couldn’t do it better. But that is not what Christmas is all about. That is what we Americans think of as Christmas. Family, food, emotional warmth, giving, decorations, music. All of it good, just not really what Christmas is about.

Christmas is about war. Now wait before you hit me or the delete key. Hear me out. Christmas, from the very first one when Jesus was born in a barn, has been about war. Jesus came that first Christmas night as an invading force into Satan's territory. God knew it and sent an angel choir to announce victory to the human captives. Satan knew it and immediately launched a counter attack through Herod to try to chase the advancing enemy away by killing the Christ child. Joseph and Mary knew it. They were told of the danger Jesus brought to them. He disrupted their lives and they could never be the same.

Jesus did not come to provide warmth and glow and television specials that make us feel good and cry at the same time, to let us have Christmas eve candlelight services that create emotional memories, to fill our homes with wonderful gifts from others, or to enjoy wonderful meals. Again, those are not bad, its just they are not Christmas. Jesus came to declare war on the Prince of darkness who rules this earth and thus set us free. Christmas was the first phase of the battle plan that eventually led Christ to the cross.

So why celebrate Christmas? Because it marks a love so big that God was willing to send all He had to free us from captivity to Satan. Satan’s plan was to kill, steal and destroy. It still is. But God’s plan is bigger, better, and victory is sure. He revives the killed, returns the stolen and rebuilds the destroyed. And He SETS US FREE! It all began at Christmas. THAT is why we celebrate. THAT is what Christmas is REALLY all about.